A strange kind of magic there was in that darkness
The pen was copying down on paper
The flights of my fantasy
Smiling, and enjoying myself thoroughly,
Unaware of the surroundings
I continued to write my poetry
I waited for that day,
When light will spread on paper
And I will see, and feel proud of,
The result of my creativity
And suddenly one day
Light came from somewhere
Excitedly, I looked at the paper
To see the reflections of the dreamy me
What then, you ask me?
Well, the paper was blank totally
The reason, as I realized after a little while:
The pen, my friend, had no ink
I laughed, till I .....
Bada sambhaal ke rakha hai us kaagaz ko aaj tak
Wo kavita jo kabhi likhi na gayi
Uske nishaan us kaagaz par aaj bhi nazar aate hain
Ye kissa kuchh ajeeb sa hai shaayad
Sunne waale kehte hain
Laane ko nayi syaahi
Aur likhne ko wo kavita phir se
Syaahi to zaroor mil jaayegi aaj bhi
Par un palon ke ehsaas ko kahaan se pakad laaoon,
Phir se
Ab to bas intezaar hai us andhere ka
Jo aayega phir se
Aur us kore kaagaz ko
Kavita bana dega phir se
The pen was copying down on paper
The flights of my fantasy
Smiling, and enjoying myself thoroughly,
Unaware of the surroundings
I continued to write my poetry
I waited for that day,
When light will spread on paper
And I will see, and feel proud of,
The result of my creativity
And suddenly one day
Light came from somewhere
Excitedly, I looked at the paper
To see the reflections of the dreamy me
What then, you ask me?
Well, the paper was blank totally
The reason, as I realized after a little while:
The pen, my friend, had no ink
I laughed, till I .....
Bada sambhaal ke rakha hai us kaagaz ko aaj tak
Wo kavita jo kabhi likhi na gayi
Uske nishaan us kaagaz par aaj bhi nazar aate hain
Ye kissa kuchh ajeeb sa hai shaayad
Sunne waale kehte hain
Laane ko nayi syaahi
Aur likhne ko wo kavita phir se
Syaahi to zaroor mil jaayegi aaj bhi
Par un palon ke ehsaas ko kahaan se pakad laaoon,
Phir se
Ab to bas intezaar hai us andhere ka
Jo aayega phir se
Aur us kore kaagaz ko
Kavita bana dega phir se
A small gripe.
ReplyDeleteAur us kore kaagaz ko
Kavita bana dega *phir se*
Remove the phir se in the end. It flows much more easily then.
Apart from that touching.
I think 3rd last line waala "phir se" hataana better idea hai.
ReplyDeleteNot sure though.
One question - could you relate it to the title?
Increasing the comment count. I like this quite a lot. And the more I read it, the more I like it.
ReplyDeleteToo good! I liked the flow. And the whole scene. And also the idea. The language change was also good. Cheers!
ReplyDeletewah ... itni taareef .. ekdum khush kar diya :)
ReplyDeleteI wrote something.. and it looked like a copy of vibhav's comment.. So lemmie just say- Cheers!! :)
ReplyDeleteAnd, write more!
dil khush kar diya launde :)
ReplyDeletei cant really relate the title though... is it the ignorance of those dark feelings you are mentioning?
Sarvesh
@vik
ReplyDeleteEk to itne dinon baad aaye ho, upar se likha kam backspace ka prayog zyaada kar diya ... you know what.. you should at least at times read stuff you write after you press the submit button :) .. waise, considering what vibhav had written, I take your comment as a compliment.
Will write whenever i am able to get some ideas .. hope it happens more frequently
@Chuddu
Dil to Sir aapne bhi khush kar diya .. title ka interpretation ye tha acc. to me .. the darkness is the ignorance that makes even a piece of blank paper seem like poetry
Now see my point..
ReplyDeleteYou meant.. "you should at least at times read stuff you write only after (i.e. 'not before') you press the submit button".. lekin thoda sa alag likhne se main ek bar ke liye confuse ho gaya.. spontaneous comments mein confuse karne ka potential hota hai! :) Khaskar mere comments mein to bahut jyada hota hai.. bina backspace ke meri life bahut troublesome ho jaayegi..
arre wo to kaafi clear hai ki confusion aur galtiyaan dono kam hongi if you verify what you write ..bas fight ye hai ki confusion avoid karne ke chakkar mein impulse bhi chali jaati hai... isi liye kabhi kabhi thodi mehnat karne ka mauka padhne waalon ko bhi do :) .. that is why I said "at times"
ReplyDeletewaise point taken :)
''Par un palon ke ehsaas ko kahaan se pakad laaoon''
ReplyDeleteWaah Janaab! :-)
Amit had mentioned about your blog, so I dropped in.
Agli baar Vincenz ya city main mehfil jamaayenge, tumhaari kavitayein sunenge fir :-)
meri "kavitaon" ki mehfil .. sunne mein kaafi achchha lag raha hai .. par maine jo bhi likha hai isi blog par hai
ReplyDeletewaise mehfil kabhi bhi kahin bhi ..shrotaon ka sada hi swaagat hai :D
[Divesh]
ReplyDeleteMaine bhi pichhle do saal me jo kuchh likha hai mere blog par hi hai.. Casual poetry ke liye topic chahiye hota hai.. Give me one!!
And btw, I'll spam you. Tumhe bahut sponty comments chaahiye na.. Ye lo! :P
topic ... hmm ... good question.. kuchh sochta hoon :D
ReplyDeletespam ke liye to dhanyawaad always
Thanks for your comment Divesh!Actually, you know what, Geetan recently showed us your blog too, and I was AMAZED, with all my vocabulary lost..when I read yours..Simple words, yet itna kuch keh dete ho! Very nice! :-))
ReplyDeleteaapne to meri already-very-limited vocabulary lost kara di :D... bahut bahut shukriya
ReplyDeletewaah waah... poetry padhna firse start karne ki sochi and this one was definitely a great start!
ReplyDeleteGood start for you, you mean?
ReplyDeleteyes yes... a good start for me! tumne to isse pehle bhi kafi likhi hai na? abhi padhunga...dheere dheere!
ReplyDeletelovely .. did that actually happen to you?
ReplyDeletelove
pooja